Posted in Depression, survive, Uncategorized

I’m still here.

Last night, I , along with a few friends, volunteered for Food for the Hungry with the Toby Mac Hits Deep Tour. It was a huge line up: Hollyn, Ryan Stevenson, Matt Powell, Matt Meher, Mandisa, Diverse City, and Capital Kings….and of course Toby Mac. The music was phenomenal. Literally, being surrounded by that many people worshipping ONE God with one voice, was truly magnificent to witness. I’m so glad I was able to be a part of such a great event.

Mandisa took the stage, and I was so excited. I absolutely love her: her voice, her energy, her love for Christ, her struggles, her pain, her joy. I can identify with her on so many levels, or so I thought. She took stage singing “Good Morning,” which is one of my all time favorites. She danced with so much energy and joy! I want that joy! Then she told us about her close friend, who was diagnosed with cancer while pregnant. She delivered her baby, but passed away later. Mandisa fell into depression. She stress eats (as many of us do), and re-gained all the weight she had lost (120 pounds) plus some. She didn’t know the pain could get that bad. Sound familiar? It did to me. She fought her way through depression and eventually began working on new songs for a new album. She sang one for us last night. Part of the song says, “And by the grace of God…I’m still here!!!! Hope is rising breaking out my soul! My God’s not done with me yet. I’m still here!”  As I lifted my hands in praise, and tears streamed down my face, I knew I identified with her on more levels that I could have ever imagined. God spoke to me through Mandisa. I’m still here. I still have work to do. God is not done using me yet. I still want to be used by God! Today, my struggles are still here, but my hope is rising, my heart is expanding, and I am trusting that God has a reason for me to still be here.

I’m so glad I was able to be a part of the work Christ is doing through the whole Hits Deep Tour. Food for the Hungry feeds families in over 12 countries; they provide water, food, schools, and work. Most importantly, they provide the Word of God being taught throughout the nations. You can sponsor a child through http://www.fh.org . I decided, last night, that I would sponsor a child in honor of our little girl. So, I picked a little girl who would be the same age as ours (6 years old), from Bangladesh. It doesn’t take much to sponsor one of these children, and you are able to correspond with the children through letters, and even meet them if you wish. Whether I ever meet her or not, we (my family and I) will sponsor, provide for, her until she is old enough to graduate high school! I do NOT say any of this to brag, because honestly, I was a little hesitant. But, again, God spoke-this time through a high school girl at the table I was assigned to. I over heard her on the phone with her mom, begging to adopt a child. She kept saying, “Just trust God, mom!” And I realized my kids would be saying the same thing. God was saying the same thing. So I do this out of trust and belief and faith that God will provide for her through our family. All the glory goes to God alone. We are called to be the hands and feet of God. The Bible references this multiple times, and the Scripture Romans 10:15 is where I chose my business name (Precious Feet Doula Services) from. We were created to glorify God, to serve Him, to love others as He loves us, to be His hands and feet on earth. I want to do my part. What ever it is, wherever I am called, I want to be willing to go and serve.

Romans 10:15 “….How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!”
Psalm 30:5 “Weeping may last for the night, but JOY comes in the morning!”
Ephesians 6:7 “Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people.”
John 15:17 “This is my command: Love each other.”

 

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Author:

I am a child of God, first and foremost. Secondly I am a wife; very much ( and sometimes undeservingly) loved, by my husband Sam. And last, but most certainly not least, I am a mom to 3 beautiful boys: Mitchell, Andrew and Buddy. We homeschool, love family time, and enjoy helping others. I am also a doula. I love my work and love writing about it as well. I am very passionate about my beliefs, and my blogs tend to show that. Enjoy reading!

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